Hard Pill vs. Soft Pillow
"What is up with my friends? Half of them take ambien to go to sleep. The other half open a bottle of wine after work, every day." This is a very curious concern coming from a thirty-year old client of mine. It saddens me to hear it. I think of the old adage about a clear conscience being a soft pillow. But could it be that so many have a nagging conscience that won't let them sleep? I don't believe so. It occurs to me that many of us keep ourselves so busy (numb) through the course of a day that there is no time for quiet reflection or just plain 'feeling." Caught in a whirlwind of being busy in the head, they may have difficulty shutting it off when it's time for sleep. This combined with the constant barrage of advertising telling us which pill will save us from what ailment, it's no wonder, really. My client who wants to be fully alive, wants to feel her feelings and allow them to be an integral part of her decision-making, feels isolated for not wanting to numb out. I recommended she consider a Core process group, where she can be with other people who work to be vitally alive and fully feeling.
But what about you? Are you one who'd like to be able to sleep without wine or a pill?
Here are some things you can do to help you unwind naturally:
Schedule downtime the same way you schedule everything else. If you don't schedule it, it's left to chance. Even 15 minutes of "nothing to do" time can give you a chance to process feelings about the events and interactions in your day. Downtime is not a nap, or television, or phone calls. It is a time of being quietly alert and aware, a chance to hear your inner voice. Having a designated place for your downtime will support the state of quiet awareness. Make sure books are closed, computer screen is out of sight and earshot, phone ringer is off. Use a timer or set an alarm, if it helps you to avoid constantly checking the clock. Feel into your body. Get comfortable. Breathe. Listen to the sound of your breath. Listen to the pulsations within. Keep a notepad nearby. If something keeps popping into your mind to distract you, jot it down. Then you can be assured you can attend to it when your time is up, leaving you free to feel yourself without the chatter. If you need something else to soothe the busyness of your mind, try using a comforting word as a mantra. For example, turn in your mind over and over one of your favorite words. Not sure, what your favorite words are? Maybe one will come to you during your downtime!
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